Said the queen of HEARTS- "Off with his HEAD" !!!

No this isn't a post about my love for that wonderful book! I am back at doing what i do best-asking silly questions!!

Well this one's about What rules a decision- the head or the heart?

To begin with, what is the definition of "head" and "heart" here?Is it about emotions? Popular notion has it that a "head" type decision maker is the practical kind and of course the "heart" type decision maker goes by what "feels" is right as opposed to how practical a decision it may be.

Arguably, we fall in either category depending on the decision itself.But in general people lean to one side or the other for most of their decisions. Any decision is difficult but don't heart decisions tend to be a little less thought out and impulsive? May be more room for regret in the future?

Being a very head type decision maker I have often found it very difficult to identify with heart type decisions!! Sometimes the lack of logic is so striking its almost as if the decision was made hoping for a miracle! Decisions colored by unrealistic optimism are as obvious to people who make them as they are to on lookers. So what makes people go ahead and make those decisions anyways? Does emotion kill the rationale of the thinking brain? Does it take one further away from reason,logic and indeed reality?

Footprints on my sand

The other day,I was listening to one of my favorite songs "Kaneerae Kaneerae" from the movie Uyire for the nth time. This time , however, was a little different because I paid attention to the lyrics . To cut a long story short, there are two lines in the second paragraph :

unnoadu naan kanda bandham
mannoadu mazhai konda sondham
kaayndhaalum adi eeram enjum

( This bond I have with you is like that of rain and the earth, the dampness beneath never dries)

Very simply put but these words kindle so many emotions! At once, one remembers all those friends that one has left behind or with whom one has lost touch and starts feeling thankful for the friends one has now!!

I know its beginning to sound like one of those forwards which tells you , you must call that friend 'cos tomorrow s/he may be dead!! So i will stop here before it gets more sugary.

But to everybody...thanks..:)

I'm cool

Having indulged my over active creative urges, the past week was spent recovering from its aftermath..:) Well, since the "she" in question is quite out of the way, atleast for now, I am at peace now.

A conversation with a friend a few days back brought to me this observation.Let me try and put it as lucidly as my clear head (pun unintended) allows me to:

Notice how in a really thick friendship between a guy and a girl,to the girl, the guy is a friend first and then a guy whereas to the guy, the girl, no matter how good a friend, is a girl first...........always. In fact, sometimes I have felt that from the guy's point of view the friendship itself is based on the one strong basis of her gender.

I have found this to be true in the many friendships I have had and the others that I have observed.Guys seem to be more at ease talking about their "soft" side with girls. It is ok for them to tell a girl how bad they are feeling about something or to cry to her when they are heart broken. Though all guys realise they they have this side and also recognise the need to talk about it , they don't do so with each other.
Why? Why is it so important for a guy to maintain the "I'm cool" image in front of other guys? What is it about a girl that brings these defences down?

Is it that she listens? But guys listen too. Is it that she is caring? Then again, guys can be equally if not more caring. Is it that she provides solutions? This definitely can't be the case because most often a girl would just listen and be sympathetic and not provide any inputs by way of solution. Then What?????

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO CALL THIS ONE WITHOUT GETTING MY ASS KICKED!!!!

Notice how the best creative activity happens when you least expect it. Well it happened to me today.....just now in fact. I was chatting with a friend on yahoo.....something i don't do often....i mean chatting on yahoo not chatting itself..:d. I noticed how cute the emoticons were and just like that I was inspired to write this narrative about my friend's happenning life......If you are patient enough.......copy it,paste it on a yahoo messenger conversation window and press enter and read it.....'cos without that its like a story by a 7 year old who just discovered that girls and boys are different beings..:D.( i dont want ppl telling me that's how it is even now...'cos a lot of effort and creative energy went into this thing!!!)

Ok I shall contain my excitement and unveil the piece of art.....here goes.....

P.S. Stick it one line at a time ...it works better then
P.S. 2 If you have no one online on yahoo to send it to......open a window and send it to yourself....that way you can read it twice....:D ( ok i am totally losing it!!!)

( * names changed to preserve anonimity)

(:| i get so tired when she* calls herself aO:-). Often i get :-& when she( its the same she throughout) goes on about it. But do u know, nowadays :x??!! of course i am X-( that she hasnt told me abt it but then i love to :-? abt her love life.

i am sure one day she'll drop the bomb and i will be like :-O..........him* :-/ ?? he(same he throughout too) is such a L-)!!!!! but tis ok if u like him ...i mean ur happiness is important ;;)...........and she will be like :">........full :x wat to do?????

and then she will be all B-) with the boyfriend and forget me.......and i'll be =((......(in front of her) actually i will be like #:-S

now its time for all of you to =D>....c'mon wasn't that a =)) story???but :-$ dont tell her ok 'cos i am really :-SS.i am a real >:) aint i? muahahahaha :d

sonnet CXXX

While some people are going to roll their eyes when they see this..........I cant help it......I am the incurable romantic..:)

My Mistress' Eyes are Nothing Like the Sun

My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;
Coral is far more red than her lips' red:
If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;
If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.

I have seen roses damask'd, red and white,
But no such roses see I in her cheeks;
And in some perfumes is there more delight
Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.

I love to hear her speak, yet well I know
That music hath a far more pleasing sound.
I grant I never saw a goddess go:
My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground.

And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare
As any she belied with false compare.

One of my favorite sonnets by the bard, the other being sonnet 143.I love this one for how aptly it captures how normal people feel about love. So is anyone perfect? and how many people are lucky enough (?) to find a perfect lover? then again, isnt perfection in itself subjective?
A friend once told me a story about a boy who wanted to marry this girl. The girl's father agrees to the match upon the condition that the boy find the tallest tree in the forest near the village. The boy having gone in comes upon the a really tall tree but goes on further to find a taller one. After a few days he is still in the forest, having lost his way, and still looking for the tallest tree.
So what makes two people commit to a relationship? The belief that they have found the tallest tree? or that this is the first tall tree they saw? What happens to people like the boy in the story? do they ever find their tall tree?

Revival

This post comes after three months of laziness...:) but I figured that,when mr.inspiration himself has decided to reconsider his decision to stop blogging,I should save my blog from dying, for what its worth.

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For Hope

Was watching a movie on Hallmark yesterday (they show some good stuff) in which the main character is dying and the family is rallying around in typical american style...all the lost love and time being made up for and stuff. They are all being cheerful "for her" when one character says something about "optimism spilling over to denial". That is what triggered off this post.

Optimism and denial- where do we draw the line?

To me they form a continuum from one end rooted in reality to another where reality fades away slowly. Optimism is healthy only until one is in touch with reality. So why does denial happen? Often we find that denial is more comforting than reality. Of course, it shields us from the "harsh" reality, to use a cliche. However, isnt it only a temporary solution? Denial just stuffs all the difficult emotions into this bag at the bottom of memory and this bag keeps growing with every uneasy memory.
So if there comes one day when the bag cant take any more where do we go?
This brings me to one more question which has been doing the rounds in my thought process for sometime now. Why do we not want to face "sad" feelings? We have been so conditioned to believe that one set of feelings are good and happy so anything that does not fulfill in this definition is the opposite...Well so be it. So why are unhappy emotions termed bad? Will denial happen if we accepted that both are happy and sad are part of the deal?

The other face of denial is hope.
"Hope holds up the world" goes a very old and oft-quoted hindi idiom. Here again, isnt hoping for the impossible also a form of denial?

Well this post is far from complete but I find myself rather inarticualte and rusty at this point in time. Hopefully the following posts will better put out what I am trying to say. (yes m. that means I have intentions of continuing this thing..:))